Psalm 62:8 "Trust in Him at all times, you people. Pour out your hearts to Him, for God is our refuge. Selah."
This last Saturday was Autism Awareness Day. My son Jacob has something called Asperger's Syndrome, which is high functioning autism. Asperger's Syndrome manifests itself mostly in the area of social skills. Kids and adults with Asperger's Syndrome (in general) are highly intelligent, but they do not understand verbal queues. Their social skills are weak and sometimes non existent. They say what they want, when they want to, and they don't necessarily understand the principle of "there's a time and a place for everything."
Well, last week, my son went to his annual eye doctor appointment. He was in rare form during the visit. As parents, we repeatedly try to teach him what is appropriate and not appropriate during social interactions. Please understand that we don't use "Asperger's Syndrome" as an excuse for rudeness. However, sometimes the things that come out of his mouth are just downright funny. The interaction with the doctor (among plenty of other comments) went something like this: "How much did you spend on all this equipment?" "You know, you spent so much money on all this stuff, but what you really needed to do was buy a new chair. These arms keep falling down." "Dude! You gotta warn a guy before you do something like that!" As I said, Jacob just says whatever comes to his brain, whether it's appropriate or even makes sense. Other comments during the doctor visit were "Can you give me my glasses back? I can't see anything at all." "Something weird happens with my eyes when I take my glasses off. My eyes get all blurry."
Yes, that's my boy. As you can imagine, life with Jacob in our house rarely offers a dull moment. He doesn't try to be funny, but the things that he blurts out from time to time crack us up. He will not hesitate to tell you what's on his mind, whether it has any context of what we're talking about or not. If your breath stinks, he tells you. If he thinks you're talking too much visiting with people after church, he downright tells you to "cut the chit-chat." Teaching him that public gas is inappropriate is even a harder task. All these social skills or lack thereof, we attribute to his Asperger's Syndrome (and then some!) Certainly, it couldn't be our parenting skills, right?
Well, since it was just Autism Awareness Day, I started to think about how many people don't really understand Jacob or Asperger's Syndrome. Most people don't know what it is and how it affects people. I also started thinking about how brutally honest Jacob is about things, and how God wants us to be that brutally honest with Him. Look at the verse to memorize for this week.
Psalm 62:8 "Trust in Him at all times, you people. Pour out your hearts to Him, for God is our refuge. Selah."
Notice that we are given a few commands here. Trust God. When? At all times. That means we trust Him in the good times, and we trust Him in the bad times. The next command is to pour out our hearts to Him. Why? He is our refuge. He is our safe place. He is the only safe place for our emotions and heart, really. Then the word "selah" means stop, pause, and think about what was just said.
As honest as Jacob is about any given situation is as honest as God wants us to be with Him. We need to tell Him how we feel, the good, the bad, and the ugly. We need to pour out our heart to Him the way Jacob pours out whatever comes to his mind. Sometimes as Christians, we get this idea that we need to talk "churchy" to God. "Oh dear God, I know you're in control, and I trust You." Sure, this is a good prayer. But if I were really pouring out my heart to God, perhaps a more honest prayer would be, "God, I know You're in control and You have a plan, but this waiting game is tough. Sometimes I feel like I'm not going to make it. I hate waiting, and I'm not good at it. I don't understand why you're allowing me to go through this trial. It hurts. I trust You know what You're doing, but... Help me, God..."
Yes, I think that's what God expects when He tells us to pour out our heart to Him. I don't know about you, but I'm guilty of talking to God in "church talk" too often. Having Asperger's Syndrome is a benefit when it comes to communication with God. Jacob doesn't know that socially he shouldn't say some things. With God, there is no social etiquette. I think we can all take a lesson from Jacob when it comes to being brutally honest with God. Let's drop our masks and get real with God.
---Beth Banfill
www.GodandMe2theMax.com