GodandMe2theMax

DadAndMe2theMax

It was 2003, and we spent our spring break in Ohio. The night before we were supposed to drive home to Texas, the hospital called telling my family that my dad had taken a turn for the worse, and we should get to the hospital as quickly as possible. His breathing was labored, and he was in and out of consciousness. We sang over his bed. We prayed over him. We told him it was ok to let go. We cried. We sang. We prayed. And we cried some more. Miraculously, and as often happens when death's door is knocking, my dad started to do better. We weren't sure if we should drive home or not, but the kids had school on Monday, and it's a long drive from Ohio to Texas. We also knew that the cycle of him getting better, worse, better, worse, etc. could go on for quite a while. We decided we should just start the trip home. By the time we hit Tennessee, I had received the call that my dad had passed away. All this took place nine years ago today, on St. Patrick's Day.

This blog is typically all about GodandMe2theMax, but the truth is that I wouldn't be where I am today in my relationship with the Lord without my dad's influence in my life. So it's only fitting today on St. Patrick's Day that I dedicate my blog to "DadAndMe2theMax."

What I learned from my dad...

1. My dad taught me tenderness when it comes to spiritual things. I can't ever remember my dad sharing his testimony of how he gave his life to Christ without breaking down in tears. I remember when I was younger, I used to watch him cry like a baby when sharing about Christ. He got saved before I was even born, but he never "got over" that moment when God penetrated his life. I'm thankful for a dad that wasn't afraid to show emotion for the things that mattered. He wasn't perfect, but he was a great example to me of passion and love for the Lord.

2. My dad taught me how to have good, clean fun. He was the funniest man I've ever known. Anyone who knew him would agree, too. At his funeral, I was able to share some of my favorite humorous stories of growing up as his daughter. I still marvel at how I managed to do this without breaking down, but somehow God gave me the strength!

There was the story of dad hiding the Pepsi bottles in the back of the toilet.

There was the story of him acting like he tripped down the stairs of the church, only to have the pastor's wife ask him if he was ok. His response, with full blown emotion, "I think I have an infected ovary."

There was the story of him being asked to close in prayer at church. He leaned forward against the pew, only to set off the musical tie he was wearing.

There was the story of the somber holiday service where the entire church circled around holding hands to sing. It was a candlelight service, if I remember correctly, and it was dark, except for my dad's flashing bow-tie.

There were the countless stories of my dad's hand-written letters to me at college. They were always so funny that I actually had friends who would check mail with me, just in case I had a letter from my dad. They loved reading with me, not to mention seeing the terrible spelling and sometimes poor grammar combinations he created.

And then there was the story of him proudly wearing his belt buckle, "World's Greatest Lover."

These are all fragmented stories with much more laughter behind them, but that was just how my dad rolled. He gave you enough to laugh hard, but not too much that he was annoying.

One of my best character qualities (at least what I like most about myself!) is my quick wit, a direct link to my dad's genes, for sure. He always had a quick and funny comment for anything. There were countless times where he tested the waitress at a restaurant. The conversation would go something like this...

"Hi! My name is Laverne. How are you today?"
Dad's response: "I'm fat."
"Great! Do you know what you want to drink today?"
Dad's response, "Yeah, I thought you'd like that one."
"Just water then?"...

As I watch my kids grow up, I'm thankful they both got that same McNabb wit, too. Every time they come up with "a good one" I know my dad is looking down from heaven with a big smile saying "That's MY granddaughter!" or "That's MY grandson!" If you're my friend on facebook, I'm sure you've seen many of these repeated examples of how my kids model their Pop-Pop. And now you know just where they got it!

3. My dad taught me how to play ball, but more importantly, he modeled some pretty important parenting skills, too. We spent endless summer afternoons and evenings pitching to each other, fielding, and sweating in the Ohio humidity. He was my biggest fan. I played on a summer league all during high school, and he never missed a game. Never. He told me what I did wrong and didn't sugarcoat it. I can remember him repeatedly saying "You're dropping your shoulder when you're at bat. You have to point your elbow more." Then he would work with me in practice on what I was struggling with. Not only did he never miss a game during summer softball season, but I don't think he ever missed a single game when I played volleyball either. When I first started, I was terrible. My skills were far behind others on my team. I warmed the bench a lot, but dad didn't care. I was his pride and joy, and I knew he wanted nothing more than to be there in the stands to support me.

My three brothers may disagree, but I know I was my dad's favorite child. How could I not be after three boys and then finally a baby girl? :) At least that's how I will choose to remember!

The truth is, I could go on and on. Memories are the most cherished thing I have. And if you don't take time to remember, you put yourself at risk to forget. How I wish my kids could have known my dad. Jacob doesn't remember him at all. Amber remembers him only after he was already sick.

But I remember. Perhaps one of the most lasting memories I have is repeatedly getting up for school at five AM, only to find my dad sitting at the dining room table reading his Bible. I had no idea back then what a precious memory that would become. He set the example for me. When my kids walk in on me having my quiet time, I always think of the same scenario when I was younger. I hope one day they will have fond memories of interruption as well.

So today, it's all about Richard Neal McNabb. It's about remembering a life of love and laughter. I will choose not to be depressed. Sure, I may shed a tear here or there, but I will not focus on the sadness of not having him around any longer. Instead, I will focus on what he taught me. He was a pretty brilliant guy for someone with only a Jr. High education!

I will choose to be the kind of parent that he modeled for me. I will love my children unconditionally. I will support them. I will teach them about spiritual things. And I will create moments for them to have lasting memories, even after I'm gone. And by God's grace, they too will go 2theMax with God because of the legacy I've invested in them. And I am who I am today in part because of DadAndMe2theMax.

 

Richard Neal McNabb
November 21, 1935 - March 17, 2003

Dad, with his famous flashing bow-tie.

 

 

---Beth Banfill
www.GodandMe2theMax.com

So you must be ready...

Matthew 24:44 "So you also must be ready..."

This morning in my quiet time, I came across the verse in Matthew where Jesus is telling the disciples that they must be ready for His return. I had to stop and ponder Jesus' command. I couldn't help but think, "What else does Jesus expect me to be ready for?" Certainly, Scripture gives some clear guidelines. II Timothy 4:2 says we should be ready in season and out of season to preach the word. I Peter 3:15 says we should be always ready to give an answer to any man who asks us about the Hope in us.

So you must be ready...
On Christmas Eve, the Lord opened up an incredible opportunity for my daughter, Amber. About five hours before the first of three Christmas services, my pastor texted me and asked if Amber would be willing to quote the Christmas story, Luke 2:1-20, at all three Christmas services.

Two Christmases ago, I worked with both of my children to memorize the Christmas story passage, Luke 2:1-20. It was something my brothers and I had all memorized as children, and it was part of my legacy that I wanted to pass on to my kids. But when I got the text from my pastor, my heart dropped. I wasn't sure if Amber could still do it, at least good enough for such an important service...and she had definitely never done it in public before.

I went upstairs to talk to Amber about it, and I could see the a bit of fear in her eyes. Then I said, "Amber, Maybe God had you learn that passage for such a time as this." She agreed to do it, and she immediately started reciting it, to be sure she had it down. I asked her a little later, "Are you sure you're ok with this? You don't have to do it." Amber's answer was simple, "Mom, it would be wrong of me to not use the talents that God has given me for Him."

"So you must be ready."
What do I need to be doing now to be ready for the next step that God is going to ask me to do? Am I spending enough time in His word to be able to have answers for people who ask about God? Am I memorizing enough of Scripture so that I will be ready to encourage a friend at the right time? God places opportunities in our path to prepare us for the next step of service to Him. The question is, will I have keen enough spiritual eyes to take advantage of the opportunity so that I will be ready for the next step He has for me? Jesus says, "I must be ready." I agree. I must be ready.

 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Glu0YyejEog

 

 

---Beth Banfill
www.GodandMe2theMax.com

"Miss Excellence"

This last weekend, my daughter Amber competed in the Miss Teen of Texas competition. Now, before you start judging me with visions of "Toddlers and Tiaras" running through your head, let me explain more. This competition is not a beauty pageant. In fact, it has nothing to do with beauty or talent. There are no crowns given, only medallions, because medallions are a symbol of excellence. ...And excellence is what we want our daughters to strive for, right? I believe in this program because it has everything to do with who I want my daughter to be on the inside! The scoring is based on the following criteria: 15% - Scholastic Record (yes, we had to turn in transcripts and report cards!) 15% - Community Service and Achievement. 15% - General Awareness test. 15% - Personality projection and poise. 15% - Personal development. 25% - Interview with the judges.

Well, Amber has been involved in this program since she was in the 3rd grade. In the younger age divisions, it's called the Distinguished Youth of America, or in Texas, the Distinguished Youth of Texas program. For seven of the last eight years, we have spent Thanksgiving weekend at this program. Some may think it's been a sacrifice...but not me. I've seen how it has helped develop Amber into the beautiful person she is today. To make a long story short, Amber ended up placing in the top 6 at the Miss Teen of Texas competition, took home a medallion, and held her head high for accomplishing what she did -- no regrets.

So this morning as I try to assimilate back into my routine, and as I contemplate the wild emotional ride for me as a parent the last three days, I have to bring it back to God...and what He expects. Now think about it. We had to prepare a resume of everything Amber has done and accomplished in her short fifteen years of life. If you had to prepare a resume of your Christian deeds, Christian involvement, Christian development, what would you put down? No, being a Christian is not about deeds. It's about your relationship with Christ. But as you develop your relationship with Christ, good works are a natural outcome of Him working in you. So again, I have to ask myself, am I pursuing my relationship with Christ in all areas of my life? If my "Christian resume" was put under a microscope and evaluated, would God consider my life one of excellence?

Before the final program, we reminded Amber of two verses. Truth be told, she is so grounded, she really didn't need to be reminded...but I needed to say it probably more for me. (What mom doesn't want their child to be 'the best'?) Romans 8:28 "All things work together for good to those who love God and who are called according to His purpose." and I Corinthians 10:31 "Whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do all to the glory of God."

So today, are these verses your mantra as well? Are your decisions based on what will glorify Him? Are you seeking Christ-like excellence in all areas of your life? What would your spiritual resume say? What would God, the ultimate judge, say about you? How would He rank you?

I'm thankful once again for the children God has given to me to help me see more Spiritual truths. May I seek excellence in all areas of my life, not just the ones people see on a day-to-day basis. Lord, let me do all to Your glory, so You will see me as one of your children of excellence!

 

---Beth Banfill
www.GodandMe2theMax.com

Do it ALL for Him...

I Corinthians 10:31 "Whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do ALL to the glory of God."

It's early on a Friday evening, but bedtime for me is right around the corner. I'm a resident chauffer and judge for Amber's debate tournaments, and tomorrow's tournament is 90 minutes away. We have to be at the high school at 5 AM, ready to pull out of the parking lot. (What was I thinking by volunteering! Someone please slap me!)

Anyway, tonight, Amber was working on her speech for the tournament tomorrow. She has memorized and prepared a 8-9 minute speech which she will delivery without notecards in a category called OO - Original Oratory. If you know Amber, you know she's a perfectionist. She got second place at the last tournament. Tomorrow, she wants it perfect, she wants it right, and sure, let's be honest, she would love to have first place. What child wouldn't after putting all that work into something? But the problem is, this week, Amber is fighting a bad throat infection, she's had little sleep, averaging about 4 hours a night, due to all the homework, and she's simply sick and exhausted.

Amber's coach is awesome, and he really knows how to motivate the students to better themselves. That's the sign of a good coach, really, when students want to do better to make the coach proud. Anyway, of course Amber wants to do good for him, too. But as she got frustrated with her soar throat and inability to speak the way she wanted, I finally had to remind her of our little family motto, one we've used over and over as she's grown up and been in different competitions. "You don't have to be the best, you just have to do your best." (She quoted it with me once she heard the first few words!)

We talked it through.

"Have you done all you can to prepare, Amber?"
"Yes, mom, I really have. But I'm still struggling with this."
"It doesn't matter, if you've done your best, that's all that matters" I said.

And then I reminded her, "First place doesn't matter. You do not need to win for your coach or even for yourself. You are doing this for God. Period. If you've done your best, that's all He expects, and you've already accomplished your goal."

God used the truth of His Word to relax her. I could see a change. Sure, her throat was still hurting really badly, and yes, she still had things to get done tonight, but I know He provided peace in her stress.

So as I write tonight, I'm contemplating that same thought. In all things, do I give 100% for God's glory? In my work? As a mom? In my domestic duties? (A-hem, no laughing! This is time for self-reflection!) As a wife? In my quiet time? In my prayer time? With my friends? Do I give it my best? Do I do it for His glory?

I love how God uses my children to teach me how far I still have to go. I can't be a know-it-all mom with all the answers when He's teaching me how imperfect I am, with so many failures. And that's just it, even when I give my best, I'm never going to be FIRST, because I AM SECOND, and that's cool with me...as long as I do it ALL for Him.

 

---Beth Banfill
www.GodandMe2theMax.com

 

True Worshippers...

John 4:23  "Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshippers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the kind of worshippers the Father seeks."

The Bible talks alot about the faith of a child.  For the blog this week, I want to use the words of my twelve year old son, Jacob.  Many of you know that he has Asperger's Syndrome, which is high functioning autism.  It manifests itself mostly in social skills, but Jacob also really struggles with his emotions.  He wants so desperately to fit in, yet he understands that he has some special needs that keep him from doing so at times.  He has highs and lows, but one thing I can say about him is that he loves Jesus with all his heart.

A few weeks ago, Jacob came to me on a Saturday and handed me thirteen little pieces of paper.  He said, "Here mom.  Last night in my bed, I just felt like God was speaking to me, and I felt like I should write this down."  I looked down at what he handed me, and it was written on the back of thirteen pieces of paper "money", about two inches by three inches.  Jacob doesn't have the best printing, but as I sat reading, I was astounded at the depth of his relationship with God.  This is what he wrote, word for word, without one edit by me.  Here is Jacob's psalm to the Lord.

*************

God, please take this pain from my heart.  It’s burning up and over, over-flowing.  I lay in my bed shedding these living tears.  The devil’s trying to conquer my thoughts.  But then I remember You, God, and I find the courage to fight back those evil thoughts.  Your name is a miracle for all those who call upon it.  And You alone have the power to turn my sadness into a joyful wake up call.  So I thank You.  Yes, I thank You, God.

Now I want to take back those actions.  Thank you for these joyful tears.  I feel renewed in Thee, Spirit.  My heart was filled with sorrow, but now You’ve filled it with joyful thanksgiving.  Hallelujah, You have strengthened my heart, with Your unending love!  Thank you, God.  You’ve made me happy once again.  Thank you, God.  Thank you, God.

When the evil one comes beckoning, I won’t let him in.  I’ll find the courage to resist him.  With Your name I can do anything.  The devil has no hold over me with this new found courage.   Nothing can stop me from living my life for You.  You healed my broken heart.  What else can I say but thank you!

You never give up on this sad lowly life.  No matter what happens, I know that You’ll be there for me.  You’ve given me something to put my trust in.  You’ve revived me.  You’ve saved me.  You protect me.  What else could I possibly need?  Oh, thank You!

When the world comes trying to kill all my hopes, I know You will be there for me, fighting back those evil lies and giving hope for the future.  You saved me from the lies and fixed my broken heart.  When I was trapped in the devil’s web of despair, You freed my heart and revived my hopes and dreams.  Oh, how could I possibly end this song of thanksgiving?  You never stop giving me a reason to be thankful.  Mere words can’t describe the power of Your name.

Thank You!

*************

I sat there, reading in amazement..  Oh the faith of a child!  Oh how much I have to learn from my sweet son!  Take a look at the verse to memorize for this week.  John 4:23  "Yet a time is coming and has now come when the true worshippers will worship the Father in spirit and truth, for they are the kind of worshippers the Father seeks."

As I read Jacob's words as he poured out his heart to God, I couldn't help but think that this was true worship.  This is the kind of worship that God expects.  And I also wondered if I had ever worshipped God with my words the way Jacob had expressed.  Sure, I was proud of him, but more so, I was humbled that this son of mine, special needs and all, could "get it" when it comes to worship.  So many times, we equate worship with singing.  After all, "worship" is the music section of church, right?  Wrong.  Worship is so much more than that, and God our Father is looking for true worshippers.  He's looking for people who worship Him in spirit and truth.  My goal:  to have the faith of a child.  Like Jacob.  To be a true worshipper.  To have my Father recognize me as one who worships Him in spirit and truth.

As we memorize the verse this week, I challenge you to write down your worship psalm to the Lord.  Pour out your heart to Him.  Be a worshipper, a true one.  Let the worshippers arise!

 

---Beth (and Jacob) Banfill
www.GodandMe2theMax.com

 

 

 

 

 

Docent for Jesus...

Deuteronomy 6:6-7  "These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts.  Impress them on your children.  Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up."

750 hours.  1250 hours.  2000 hours.  As I wandered through the Richard Nixon Presidential Library and Museum in Yorba Linda, California, last week, I quickly became intrigued with the docents that were in each room, ready and willing to share any and all knowledge of the museum with me.  They each carried a small notebook with handwritten letters and actual historical pictures, bringing history to life.  Each docent also bore a name tag with their landmark number of volunteer hours printed on it.  There was one other point of comparison with each docent, and this one was quite apparent - they were each, shall I say, getting up in their years. 

Let me be honest here.  I didn't grow up loving history.  In fact, it wasn't until recent years that I found a museum actually something of interest rather than a torturous intrusion on my sleep.  However, being married to a lover of history tends to rub off on you, and after almost twenty years now, I can actually say I not only tolerate museums, but I actually like them.  You see, I got through history in school with B's and C's, but I never really embraced its importance.  My parents didn't instill a love for history in me, and frankly, that was just fine with me.  But now that I'm learning to love history, perhaps for the first time in my life, I wonder how many other people are out there just like me.  Worse yet, I wonder how many people are raising their children with the same lack of interest for history.  As I walked through the museum last week, looking at the docents and their volunteer hours, I couldn't help but wonder if museum docents would soon be a thing of the past, taking with them the mass amounts of knowledge that they bare.   

In Deuteronomy 6, God charged the Israelites to be, in a sense, spiritual docents.  Look at the verse to memorize for this week.  (Yes, I know, there's two verses to memorize, but I needed to include both for cohesiveness sake, ok?)   We are to love God, think constantly about His commandments, teach His commandments to others, and live our lives daily by the guidelines He sets out for us. 

Can you imagine how many volunteer hours we would have on our name plate if we actually lived our lives the way God expects us to?  Some of the docents at the museum logged 2000 hours and more.  Yet, how many hours have I spent telling others about Christ?  How much time have I spent teaching others about His mighty works?  Have I committed my life to teaching others His-Story?  Am I logging hours, talking about God when I am at home, walking down the road, laying down, and sitting up?  Or, like the gray haired guides in the museum, are spiritual docents quickly becoming a dying profession? 

Have I been obedient and served my God enough to even earn the title "Docent for Jesus" on my name tag?  How many hours of service will my name badge list when I get to heaven?  
 

---Beth Banfill
www.GodandMe2theMax.com

 

 

Is there a pickle on your plate?

Proverbs 14:29  "A patient man has great understanding, but a quick-tempered man displays folly."

As part of my job when I worked in Ohio, I used to teach customer service skills.  There's something we taught called a "hook."   A "hook" is something that invites you into unproductive behavior.  Simply put, it's the breaking point that makes you lose your temper.  I have a few hooks that I know of.  Do you know yours?  Knowing and identifying your own hooks is sometimes half the anger battle.  Once you know what makes you angry, it's a lot easier to give it over to the Lord. 

Many of you know about my son Jacob and some of his struggles and special needs.  Jacob has Asperger's Syndrome and severe ADHD, but about five years ago, we found out that he had a lot of bio-chemical issues as well.  Some of these bio-chemical problems manifested themself as bi-polar symptoms, and for years, Jacob experienced uncontrollable rage.  Jacob will turn twelve in a few days, and he has a sensitive heart for the Lord now.  He has given me permission to share his story with the Groupies4God and on my blog, specifically a story about one of Jacob's hooks.

Let me give you a little history.  By the time Jacob was about three or four, we knew we had a strong-willed child on our hands.  Both my husband and I worked full time, so we had to rely on pre-schools and day cares for our child care.  For a while, we had a great friend in our church care for our kids, but we ended up needing to move to the daycare route.  It didn't take long for us to be on speed dial with the daycare; in actuality, they had us on speed dial.  I can remember day after day seeing the phone ring with the caller ID identifying the caller as the daycare.  My heart would drop each time.  Not again!  What did he do now?  The truth is that by the time Jacob turned five, he was kicked out of every day care in our city and a few in the surrounding cities.  One of those was after a few short hours!

You see, Jacob had a real problem with anger.  It was as if something wouldn't settle with him, a swtich would be flipped, and a boy I didn't know would emerge. There was no rhyme or reason to his rage, and as a result, he was given a bi-polar diagnosis, at a much too early age.

A daily phone call was expected from the day care, and at least three times a week, things would get so bad that we would have to pick him up.  My husband and I took turns leaving work early to deal with the problems, and this time it was his turn.  "Come pick Jacob up, please, asap."  No explanation given; none requested.  We knew the drill.  I could tell the infraction was pretty severe, based on the curtness of the call I received.  When my husband Frank arrived to pick Jacob up, he got the whole story. 

The daycare was one of those that served also as a pre-school.  They served lunch to a the kids on one of those expandable lunch tables with the seats attached.  All of the children were seated at the table, food on the trays, and getting ready to eat.  The teacher then put Jacob's tray in front of him.  It consisted of a burger, a side item, and one infamous pickle.  You see, when Jacob was served his tray, that switch in his brain flipped.  He promptly got up on top of the table, ran up and down the table-top, kicking every child's food on the floor and all over the rest of the kids.  By the time the teacher caught him, it was too late.  The damage was done, with lunch for the entire class ruined. 

My husband got Jacob in the car, and started to talk to him.  I'm so thankful for a mild-mannered husband who almost never loses his temper.  The Lord knew I needed him, and the Lord knew Jacob needed a daddy who didn't lose his temper; one who always showed unconditional love.  If I had been the one to pick Jacob up that day, well, I don't know how I would have reacted, but I know it would not have been in a Godly way!  "Son, what were you thinking?"  Frank asked.  Jacob's response, "They put a pickle on my plate, and you know I don't like pickles!" 

A pickle.  That's all it took.  It was the pickle that has everlasting meaning in our home.  These days, we often joke around with Jacob and ask him if he wants a pickle with his food.  He isn't the best with kidding around, but he knows we ask that question in jest.  His answer always remains the same: a firm "No!"

When Jacob was in first grade, he was kicked out of public elementary school and put in what is called the BAU - Behavior Adjustment Unit.  That's where they put the 12 worst kids in the district.  You see, they tried to work with us, they really did.  In first grade, Jacob went through about six teachers, including two "Teachers of the Year", one of which was the Special Ed "Teacher of the Year" for the district.  But the day Jacob sent one of them  to the hospital was probably the breaking point. 

Shortly after Jacob was put in the BAU, we found a non profit clinic outside of Chicago, IL, called the Pfeiffer Treatment Center.  Jacob had been to neurologists, psychiatrists, psychologists, pediatricians, and any other kind of doctor that we thought would help.  But the Pfeiffer Treatment Center did bio-chemical testing that none of these other doctors had ever attempted.  They found that Jacob was actually not bi-polar, although he had many of the symptoms.  No, in actuality, he had an overgrowth of yeast in his system that was literally taking over his whole body.  Within a few days of being on the medicine, Jacob's rage was nearly gone.  The BAU teacher (who was initially skeptical of the findings) called us up and asked what changes we had made.  She could not believe her eyes.  The boy who just days before had caused an evacuation of the entire BAU was now the star student.  We believe God directed us to PTC to save Jacob's life.  No, not save it spiritually, but physically.  Today, Jacob is in the 6th grade, and in the Gifted and Talented program and doing awesome!

Hooks.  Jacob's hook at the daycare that day was a pickle.  I think I've mentioned previously that I used to have a terrible temper.  It's amazing how when you commit something to the Lord, He can miraculously take away the sin.  But just like the verse from  last week, it's important to continue to identify and do a self examination of sin in your life.  You see, I've found that when I let my guard down, my hooks return, and with a vengeance.  I don't try to lose my temper, no one does.  

Back to the verse.   "A patient man has great understanding, but a quick-tempered man displays folly."

When things don't go as planned, when my hooks manifest themselves, am I patient?  Or like the pickle on the plate, do I respond with a quick temper, resulting in folly?

Take some time to identify what your hooks are.  Now think about how you can respond to those times with patience instead of being quick to become angry.  The verse this week is a good reminder to me on how to react when "there's a pickle on my plate."

 

PS - If you want more information on the Pfeiffer Treatment Center, click on the link on the left of my blog entitled "Jacob's Journey."

 

---Beth Banfill
www.GodandMe2theMax.com

 

 

Monday Memory Verse - Matthew 23:12 - King LeBron or King Jesus

Matthew 23:12    "For whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted."

Growing up the youngest with three brothers, I have a strong competitive edge.  I want to win and be successful at everything I try.  Most people do.  So when LeBron James announced a few days ago that he was going from Cleveland to the Miami Heat, my first reaction was, "Who can blame him?"  He is taking less money, moving away from home, sharing the spotlight, all in hopes of winning a championship.  Come on Cleveland fans, give the guy a break!  He is just following his heart and making decisions that he thinks are best for his future goals.

Then I was reminded of Jesus. 

I started thinking about the comparison of King LeBron to King Jesus.  Jesus, the King of Kings, ultimate Champion, humbled himself and entered this earth as a servant.  Perhaps his philosophy was just a little different than that of LeBron James, though.  His purpose was to serve, not to win.  He didn't make decisions in life based on short term goals of winning.  In everything Jesus did, He knew the ultimate goal was for him to go to the cross, endure shame and pain, for you and me.  By giving the ultimate sacrifice He did win...conquering sin and death.

Jesus could have easily responded to those tormenting Him, "Don't you know who I am?"  He could have found another way to pay for our sins.  But no.  Philippians 2:8 says "And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself and became obedient to death, even death on a cross."

Mark 10:43-45  "...whoever wants to be great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be slave of all.  For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many."

The verse for the week says, "Whoever exalts himself will be humbled and whoever humbles himself will be exalted."  I Peter 5:6 says "Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand,that he may lift you up in due time."  James 4:10 says "Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will lift you up."

These verses are commonly talked about between my husband Frank and I.  You see, I live with perhaps the most humble person I've ever met.  He has amazing talent.  He is a Godly husband and father.  He is an entrepreneur, a natural leader, a brilliant teacher, preacher, and writer.  He's a visionary.  He has unbelievable insight into the Word that teaches me daily.  He's up on all the political stuff and can carry on an intelligent conversation on just about any subject.  (Now, lest you think I am delusional and have a perfect husband, let me assure you that I know I do not.  Among other things, he doesn't take the trash out nearly enough, he's not so good at home improvement projects, and he definitely cannot sing.  Perfect for me, maybe, but definitely not perfect.)

Yet, with all these talents that he does have, you would never know it by talking with him.  He never toots his own horn.  He doesn't sing his own praises.  And that means he's often overlooked and under-acknowledged for what he has to offer.  As his wife, I hate this, and it frustrates me.  I tell him, "You need to do this...you need to do that.  Why don't they see that in you?"  Then in true Frank fashion, he reminds me of these verses on humility.  He just keeps plugging away at life, waiting on God to open the right doors, waiting on God to exalt him.  He knows that is all that matters.  "Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted."  I have a lot to learn from Frank.  LeBron could probably learn a lot, too.

So whether LeBron did the right thing or not, perhaps only time can tell.  But for me, it's important to think with Biblical perspective about the decisions I am making.  Am I making decisions so I can be first?  So I can win?  Am I acting in humility?  Am I modeling humility to my children?  Am I making decisions based on a short-term goal, or am I making decisions based on eternal significance?  Teach me, Lord, to live my life so that I have more of you and less of me.



---Beth Banfill
www.GodandMe2theMax.com

Praying for Success? Or Praying for Servants?

Matthew 20:20-28
20) "Then the mother of Zebedee's sons came to Jesus with her sons, and kneeling down, asked a favor of Him.  21) "What is it you want?" He asked.  She said, "Grant that one of these two sons of mine may sit at your right and the other at your left in your kingdom."  22) You don't know what you are asking," Jesus said to them.  "Can you drink the cup I am going to drink?"  "We can," they answered.  23) Jesus said to them, "You will indeed drink from my cup, but to sit at my right or left is not for me to grant.  These places belong to those for whom they have been prepared by my Father."  24) When the ten heard about this, they were indignant with the other two brothers.  25) Jesus called them together and said, "You know that the rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their high officials exercise authority over them.  26) Not so with you.  Instead, whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant.  27) and whoever wants to be first must be your slave -- 28) just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many."

A familiar story for most.  James and John, along with their mother come to Jesus and ask for "special seating" in heaven.  Who do you think prompted this?  The Bible says that they went together, but the mom is the one who was doing the talking.  Isn't it like a mom to brag about her kids constantly?  I know I do it...a lot.  When you love your kids and your kids love you and life is good, how can you not brag?  It's a mom's job, right?

But the whole purpose of this story is about being a servant.  So as I tried to really put myself in the shoes of James and John's mom, I realized something.  I'm a lot like her.  No, I don't pray that my kids will have prominence in heaven.  But it's not uncommon for me to pray that they will be successful in what they are attempting to do.  In fact, that's much of the focus of my prayers for them.  I pray that they will be successful in their spiritual life (nothing wrong with that) but then I also pray for success in school.  I pray for good grades, good friends, for their future mate.  Sure, there's nothing really wrong with this.  We should be praying for every aspect of our children's lives.  But do we pray that they will learn to be a servant?  Ouch.  I've been praying for a lot of things...but praying for servanthood has been absent.

A few weeks ago I met with two other ladies from our small group.  I listened as my friend Cyndi poured out her heart about what God had been speaking to her about.  She felt called to organize monthly service projects within our small group so our families can serve together.  Friends with friends.  Siblings with siblings.  Men with men.  And parents with children.  We made a list of possible projects to do together, and we'll soon introduce these things to our small group to discuss.  I don't know how they are going to be received, but I am so excited about it.  The activities ranged from simple nursing home visits, feeding the homeless in Dallas, volunteering at a shoe warehouse for orphans, and being involved with our church's SOUL ministry once a quarter in downtown Dallas.  Nearly everything we listed costs only one thing:  our time.

So as I read about James and John and their mom this morning, I can't help but think that my thought process also is a little warped.  Too often in my prayer life I pray for success when I should be praying for servanthood...in my life and in the life of my children.  Servanthood just doesn't come naturally to most people, with me being the chief sometimes.  I want my life to model to my children what a servant would look like.  Sometimes that means getting dirty.  Sometimes that means just giving up what I want...and selfishness is something I struggle with.

There's an old song I sang at my high school graduation.  It's called "Make Me a Servant."  It has a simple melody and words, but it's what is on my heart today.

Make me a servant, humble and meek. 
Lord, let me lift up those who are weak.
And may the prayer of my heart always be
Make me a servant.  Make me a servant.
Make me a servant today.

What's the prayer on your heart today?  Success or servanthood?

 

---Beth Banfill
www.GodandMe2theMax.com

Monday Memory Verse - I Thessalonians 2:19-20 "Chick Flick in Heaven"

I Thessalonians 2:19-20  "For what is our hope, our joy, or the crown in which we will glory in the presence of our Lord Jesus when He comes?  Is it not you?  Indeed, you are our glory and joy."

{Yes, I know.  I have two verses listed to memorize, but they go so well together I had to include verse 20, too. Come on...it's only seven more words.  Memorize a little extra with me!}

Think about it.  Classic movie, probably a chick-flick.  Boy and girl are best friends throughout school.  Boy falls for popular girl in school (not his best friend, of course.)  Best girl friend watches from a distance while hopelessly in love with the boy.  In the end, the best friends realize they were made for each other.  The movie ends with some cheesey line like: "It's you.  You were the one who makes me happy.  There could never be anyone else.  You are my joy!"  I can think of half dozen movies that follow the same story line, and when done right, it never gets old.

The lines for this week's memory verse read much like a line from one of these classic chick-flicks.  However, the story behind it is much more powerful than the predictable ones we have all seen so many times.  If you have time this week, read through the book of I Thessalonians.  It's only five chapters long and is not a difficult read.

Paul poured his life and ministry at the time into the new Christians at Thessalonica.  They were in essence, his children.   He "raised" them from the time that they were babies in Christ and encouraged them to stand firm in their faith, even when difficult times came.  

As I read these verses, I could practically hear Paul's heart pouring out to the Church at Thessalonica.  Think drama, and I don't mean TNT.  This is classic.  We're talking, almost like Shakespeare.  Keep that in mind and muster up your best acting skills, then read the verse out loud.  "What is our hope, our joy, and the crown in which we will glory...Is it not you?  Indeed you are our glory and joy."

Paul's greatest joy was the people in whom he invested his life.  As I put myself in Paul's place, I ask myself the obvious question.  Who have I invested myself into with such passion that I could say, "Is it not you?  Indeed, you are my glory and  joy!" 

Sure, the easy answer is my children.  That's my job as a parent, right?  ...to raise them in a Godly home and teach them (like Paul did the Thessalonians) to grow in Christ?  But if I answered that question with "Jacob and Amber...indeed, they are my glory and joy"...well, that may be true.  But I'm thinking that God would want more than the obvious answer here.

At this point, I don't think I could honestly give a comparison answer to Paul's passion for the ones he was discipling, and that's why I chose these verses to memorize.  I believe God wants me to have an answer.  He wants me, like Paul, to pour my life into people so that they become like Him. 

Discipleship in churches today is often non-existent. I believe each one of us should be discipling at least one person.  Isn't that what Paul did?  He taught those people what it meant to really follow Christ.  He loved on them.  He bragged on them.  He prayed for them.  He said, "Dude.  I'm here for you.  When hard times come, know that I'm praying for you."  OK, maybe he didn't say dude, but you know what I mean.  He was a Spiritual rock.  And the cool thing is that Paul didn't do it for show.  I Thessalonians 2:4 says he had an audience of One.

In order to disciple someone, you need to be Spiritually ready yourself.  Maybe you're not quite there.  Maybe you feel inadequate.  If that's you, find another person to work with you.  If you are a seasoned Christian and are not involved in disciple making, ask God to show you what to do. If you're not sure where to start, go to www.24-7Discipleship.com.   

I don't know about you, but by the time I step into the presence of Jesus, I want to be able to passionately answer that question, "What is my hope, my joy, and the crown in which I will glory?  Is it not you?  Indeed, you are my glory and joy."  No, I don't have a definitive answer yet.  But I plan on investing my life for God so that one day I will.  And when I lay that crown at Jesus' feet, I'll be kneeling, I'll be worshiping, I'll be smiling, but I won't be crying ('cuz there's no tears in heaven, you know - Revelation 21:4).  And I have a feeling it will be better than any chick-flick or Shakespearean drama that ever played out.

---Beth Banfill
www.GodandMe2theMax.com